Friday, January 29, 2010

Haven't Changed the World Yet

I was leaving my gym on Wednesday and one of my classmates was waiting on the sidewalk.  I said goodbye and headed to my car when a small voice inside said, ,"Maybe she needs a ride."  Immediately I went through the mental gymnastics of a hummingbird on speed.  What if she needs a ride everyday?  What if I'm going to have to be her transportation?  How can I do that, given my time constraints? Do You want me to invest in her life?  Am I ready for another relationship?  On and on it went in the space of 15 seconds -- amazing, isn't it?

Finally that little voice said, "Just offer her a ride."  So I did.  She didn't need one after all -- she was waiting for a friend. 

I share that because I think it is going to be fairly normal as I seek to live intentionally.  It isn't that I'm going to be scaling the heights of radical obedience and changing the world in the process in 2010.  I can romanticize that idea and spend the entire year telling myself I'm ready for the BIG CALL.  But I'm guessing that far more often the Lord will simply be nudging me to do some small thing.  No glamour, no grand sacrifice -- just little acts of obedience, which Jesus said was way better in the end.

 To be honest, I wish I were far more holy about this.  Will I ever get to the point where those mind games don't have to happen before I simply say "Yes"?


  1. Tricia, God's nudges is a good way to describe it. I always thought that God's whispers was more passive and not really giving us the "call to action."

    Good blog; I'll follow you. Actually, I've read Sacred Chaos (great book) and am writing a review for my web site, God Bless.

  2. I am in for the Sermon on the Mount challenge. I have been following this years resolution closely. Intentional was the word the Lord gave me for 2009. I set out to simply be intentional in radiating the Heart of Jesus and found nothing simple about it. It was, however, His intentions FOR me that would be my greatest challenge and now are the sweetest of memories. Living loved,living out loud, intentionally and in the end it was His intention for me and Joy the reward. His word for me this year "continue"

  3. Speaking of mind games -- I started reading Matthew 1 & 2 without really making a commitment because I hate it that I start things that I do not complete -- like 2009's "Living Loved." I can make all kinds of excuses, like our move to Lithuania was huge, but the truth is I could have jumped back in from where I left off. I have this perfectionist bent that says I must do it ALL, do it WELL, and therein I sabotage myself. So, late last week I sat down and really thought and prayed about what it was I wanted to commit to, or believed I was being asked by the Lord to do. I looked up the word "intentional" and "intent" in the dictionary and made notes for myself. I came up with some good motivational thoughts which I wrote in my journal, along with supporting scriptures. Okay, so this morning I reread this blog, like the first day's entry, and realize I missed something really significant. Though it is important to read and study Matthew, and to memorize the Sermon On the Mount this year, to pray and journal about insights and sometimes to blog about it, most essential is the "delighting in" and "dialoging with" the Lord and obeying His promptings. I feel like a big failure already. But really -- easing up a little bit I see that what I wrote GOAL: "to know Jesus Christ and to become more like Him; and the PURPOSE: to fix my gaze on Jesus are worthy motivations. I see all working together to help me be intentional about being relational with my Lord. I'm "in" and up for the journey :-)

  4. I love the dialogue -- truly we are all fellow strugglers, sharing as I wrote above -- the thrill of victory and the agony of defeat. I do believe one of Satan's greatest ploys is to stop us before we ever start simply by throwing condemnation, fear, self-doubt etc. etc. our way.

    But truly it is all about HIM -- our Lord who loves to walk in intimacy with us and whisper His heart to us out of eternal love. How amazing is it that we have this privilege, and a DAD who is laughing and rejoicing with all of our haphazard efforts to please Him.

    Keep the comments coming as we encourage each other!

  5. Trish,
    Reading your blog helps me understand so much how God works. His word to me now is: Keep still and let me make the change. Let go and let God...

    Knowing my original purpose will guide me into the understanding of knowing what kind of change he is allowing me to help with in the world. God is in the small and big. Love your blog.